DISCLAIMER :This post is a satirical take on the life and incidents
around the life of a Tech Professional in his late 20’s. I have tried my
level best to be as impersonal as possible resemblances with real life
are purely co incidental. This post has to be taken in a lighter vein
rather than as a serious work. The incidents described may or may not
have any resemblance to real life incidents in the writer’s life even
though the blog is written in first person.
When Are You Getting Married? is a question that I have been hearing a lot these days. Be it family friends colleagues relatives and all and sundry. Oh boy I miss being unemployed would be my first thought. To tell you the truth initially I was very happy to hear this the simple reason being that it felt good that people realised that you were fit enough to start a family. But after that initial period it started to piss me off. Whenever people start talking with me the end point would be my marriage. The moment I hear the dreaded M-word I would either switch the topic or get the hell out of there. So much so that I hate going for social gatherings these days.
Earlier when you go for a get together of your college mates or school mates only a minority were married and we bachelors use to gang up and start pulling their leg. But nowadays it is the other way round and the married guys would be making our life miserable. But there is always a comeback line for us when we say that we are going to party that night. I have noticed that it is your just married peers who would be nagging you the most by telling you to get hitched sooner than later. The fact being they can’t stand the thought of us being single and happy. There is also the other end of the spectrum who advice us to live life to the fullest and gradually settle down .
It is not that I am averse to get married or anything it is only that I am not too comfortable with the idea of an arranged marriage. How can two total strangers who hardly know each other go on and get hitched one fine day. Maybe it goes over my head when it comes to that let’s not get into that debate now.
Moving on let me talk about the psyche of a Malayalee girl to whom in all probability I would end up getting married to. She would be a huge fan of the evergreen heavyweight hero Mohanlal just like the 60 % of the state’s population but when it comes to a groom they want someone with the body of a Hrithik Roshan. And poor guys like me who are at the receiving end would have to give up almost everything including alcohol, tasty food and what not. And it does not end there it includes sweating it out at the gym hours on end. Hoping to at least to get a lightweight body whereby we don’t get chucked out of the marriage market just because of our weight. And having a sedentary job does not make our job in anyway easier.
Gone are the days when a good job was the only criterion for a groom . Nowadays a lot of factors come into play including habits like your drinking, smoking, partying, being a spendthrift, god fearing and the list is endless. So much so that a prospective groom can be rejected solely on the basis of what appears on his facebook wall. I have known countless instances where the guys have to tweak their FB pages so as to score brownie points in the eyes of a would be bride. I shudder to think what all young men like me have to go through to get a better half.
Without mentioning the role of matrimonial sites this piece would be incomplete .Today the first thing that young people and their parents do when they start looking for a match is to make an attractive profile in some well known site. I am totally uncomfortable with this idea it reignites my reservations about arranged marriage. All it takes for a guy like me is 2 months he needs to regularly workout become a teetotaller eat healthy at the end of it go to a professional photographer or at least someone who has the basic knowledge of photography and bang you have a kickass profile. Or if you are too lazy for that there is always photoshop to your rescue. Here you are marketing your fake ‘self’ rather than the real ‘you’ which I guess is too much of a manipulation for a serious thing like marriage.
When Are You Getting Married? is a question that I have been hearing a lot these days. Be it family friends colleagues relatives and all and sundry. Oh boy I miss being unemployed would be my first thought. To tell you the truth initially I was very happy to hear this the simple reason being that it felt good that people realised that you were fit enough to start a family. But after that initial period it started to piss me off. Whenever people start talking with me the end point would be my marriage. The moment I hear the dreaded M-word I would either switch the topic or get the hell out of there. So much so that I hate going for social gatherings these days.
Earlier when you go for a get together of your college mates or school mates only a minority were married and we bachelors use to gang up and start pulling their leg. But nowadays it is the other way round and the married guys would be making our life miserable. But there is always a comeback line for us when we say that we are going to party that night. I have noticed that it is your just married peers who would be nagging you the most by telling you to get hitched sooner than later. The fact being they can’t stand the thought of us being single and happy. There is also the other end of the spectrum who advice us to live life to the fullest and gradually settle down .
It is not that I am averse to get married or anything it is only that I am not too comfortable with the idea of an arranged marriage. How can two total strangers who hardly know each other go on and get hitched one fine day. Maybe it goes over my head when it comes to that let’s not get into that debate now.
Moving on let me talk about the psyche of a Malayalee girl to whom in all probability I would end up getting married to. She would be a huge fan of the evergreen heavyweight hero Mohanlal just like the 60 % of the state’s population but when it comes to a groom they want someone with the body of a Hrithik Roshan. And poor guys like me who are at the receiving end would have to give up almost everything including alcohol, tasty food and what not. And it does not end there it includes sweating it out at the gym hours on end. Hoping to at least to get a lightweight body whereby we don’t get chucked out of the marriage market just because of our weight. And having a sedentary job does not make our job in anyway easier.
Gone are the days when a good job was the only criterion for a groom . Nowadays a lot of factors come into play including habits like your drinking, smoking, partying, being a spendthrift, god fearing and the list is endless. So much so that a prospective groom can be rejected solely on the basis of what appears on his facebook wall. I have known countless instances where the guys have to tweak their FB pages so as to score brownie points in the eyes of a would be bride. I shudder to think what all young men like me have to go through to get a better half.
Without mentioning the role of matrimonial sites this piece would be incomplete .Today the first thing that young people and their parents do when they start looking for a match is to make an attractive profile in some well known site. I am totally uncomfortable with this idea it reignites my reservations about arranged marriage. All it takes for a guy like me is 2 months he needs to regularly workout become a teetotaller eat healthy at the end of it go to a professional photographer or at least someone who has the basic knowledge of photography and bang you have a kickass profile. Or if you are too lazy for that there is always photoshop to your rescue. Here you are marketing your fake ‘self’ rather than the real ‘you’ which I guess is too much of a manipulation for a serious thing like marriage.
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